| A Quilter of People
By Rev.C
My grandparents lived long contented Christian lives. Grandma Dora lived
to 102 and Grandpa, whom I called Pop, lived to 97. I had the privilege of
performing their funeral. I likened my Pop to a "high-yield garden"
and my dear Grandma to a "beloved old quilt." Grandma had given
me a quilt top she pieced together so before the funeral I found a quilter
in my church to teach me some basic skills. I finished the quilt for display
at the funeral. After the service, a crusty 94 year old woman came to me and
proclaimed, "My name is Sadie. I quilted with your grandma for over 40
years at the Methodist church. I've seen your quiltin' and I've heard your
preachin'. You stick to preachin!"
I'm still quilting and I'm still preaching.
My favorite medium for quilts however, is not fabric but people. Bringing
people together with their true emotions and spiritual needs is what I do,
and I do this by building small groups where commitment to God and each other
is taken very seriously. These small groups become rich quilts. Why, my whole
life has been quilting folks together! I started my first small group Bible
study in my basement when I was 15.
I grew up in a stable, happy home: mom, dad, an older sister and brother.
On Sunday we attended the United Church of Christ. There I learned to love
tea and cookies--and God--passionately. During high school I went to Young
Life and Campaigners Bible study. I dated a guy named Stuart and hosted charade
parties at my house nearly every weekend.
As an eager adolescent Christian I memorized lots of scripture, including
all of I Corinthians 13. When I was angry at someone, I would go into the
bathroom and recite those verses, thus beginning some dysfunctional behavior.
Being a true goodie-goodie, I brought home all A's and ran for every school
office that I could. I worked, twirled a baton and also became involved in
a Nazarene youth group.
At Whitworth College I learned the importance of doing justice, and doing
mission work. I continued to subscribe to James' idea of faith and works.
Although I wanted to become a doctor, everyone I knew thought I should become
a minister. Following graduation and after a summer internship in youth ministries,
I married my high school sweetheart. Stuart and I both went off to Princeton
Theological Seminary to become ministers.
After graduation, we began our ministry in Southern California at a Presbyterian
church. I loved youth ministries. While in Southern California, my world began
to change. My world view expanded and so did our family. I became the mother
of two wonderful, talented children, Ty and Brynn. My work with small groups
continued even after we left California and moved to Portland. It was there
my pastoral skills were directed into the business world. During my consulting
work, I met Connie, who would eventually become my life partner.
The next few years were wonderful and awful. I knew I loved Connie but the
drama that plays out in a divorce and custody battle is scary. I was afraid
I would lose my children, my profession and many long term friends. During
the custody battle I was away from my children for the better part of two
years. Connie was my support and my rock. In the end, Connie and I gained
equal custody which is what we had wanted in the first place. Kids need both
parents! We love our time with the Brynn and Ty and consider it a privilege
to share our lives together.
I have loved my involvement in EC. At my first ConnECtion in 1994 I cried
a lot. I was so relieved to find other gay and lesbian Christians like me.
Last summer Connie and I took Ty and Brynn to the conference with us and they
were warmly welcomed by many. Their impression of the gay and lesbian community
is loving and wonderful.
Now when we travel as a family, I sometimes quilt when Connie drives. As
we live our lives in Gig Harbor, Washington, I am beginning a ministry with
the gay and lesbian community in the Puget Sound area. Like I said earlier,
my favorite medium for quilts is not fabric but people. After all, I've been
quilting people together my whole life.
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